When conflicts arise, there is one common root to a problem between two people, easily solved yet always repeated: miscommunication.

In Tom Sivertsen’s lecture “Person to Person: communication skills for the journalist” at the JEA conference in Boston, the importance of attentive listening and engaging conversation are proven through three rules.

Rule 1. Active Listening
Getting inside a person’s head is guaranteed to lead to the ideal interview. Half the job is writing, half the time is getting into their shoes and understanding. “Be empathetic, not sympathetic,” Silvertsen said.

Rule 2. Be genuine
You never know if what a person’s really feeling, so continue to check back in with how they’ve said they feel with the use of phrases like:
“So what you’re saying is…”
“I’m wondering…”
“I think…”
People like to see honesty, and it can make them feel more comfortable around you.

Rule 3. Specificity
High quality specificity is necessary, others like to see their ideas thrown back at them to show your participation. By using detail, you are showing interest. It’s important to show an interviewee that you’re actually interested in what they’re saying and you aren’t just there because you have to be.